I’m grateful...for you. Thank you for sharing your vision, perceptions and insights through the years. You have made life a little easier to process, digest and understand.
Everyone has a story and there are times when a story must be shared, not just for clarity or for the sake of truth, but also to take back one’s life. My name is Kate Gould. I am a 48 year old mother of two boys ages 7 and 10. My story takes place in a southern suburb of Denver Colorado in 2021 and 2022. I was in my last year of graduate school at the Iliff School of Theology. My boys were in first and fourth grades at our neighborhood elementary school in the Douglas County School District (DCSD). My oldest, Jackson, had been there since kindergarten and loved it. He was a good student, kind, and considerate. My boys walked to school together every day picking up friends in the neighborhood along the way. They were active in gymnastics and music lessons. We were living the suburban version of the “American Dream.” We were happy.
In November of 2021, four new individuals were elected to the Douglas County Board of Education, having run on the platform of “Kids First.” Their platform came straight from the right wing conservative playbook - Critical Race Theory, Anti-Equity, Anti-Mask. Those four individuals represented the new majority and on December 8, 2021, less than one month after they were elected, they removed the mask mandate in Douglas County Public Schools. Those of us with children with medical conditions were told to work with our individual principals to get masking accommodations.
Jackson was diagnosed with cystic fibrosis at three weeks old via newborn screen. He takes over 30 pills and does almost 2 hours of treatments daily, just to stay healthy. Cystic fibrosis is a progressive, life limiting, genetic disease that affects the lungs, pancreas, and other organs. In people with CF, mutations in the cystic fibrosis transmembrane conductance regulator (CFTR) gene cause the CFTR protein to become dysfunctional. When the protein is not working correctly, it’s unable to help move chloride — a component of salt — to the cell surface. Without the chloride to attract water to the cell surface, the mucus in various organs becomes thick and sticky. In the lungs, the mucus clogs the airways and traps germs, like bacteria, leading to infections, inflammation, respiratory failure, and other complications. For this reason, avoiding germs is a top concern for people with CF.
The morning of December 9, 2021 I went directly to Jackson’s school, Heritage Elementary, and asked to see the principal, Jean Wolach, as parents had been instructed to do by the Board of Education President, Mike Peterson. I was told she was too busy to see me. I told the secretary I would wait. Two hours later, Mrs. Wolach met with me and I asked for a masking accommodation to be placed in Jackson’s 504 medical plan. It was denied. I provided a letter from Jackson’s pulmonologist and it was again denied. I hired a special education attorney. For the next month, the special education attorney and I met with school administrators and continued to be denied. We provided another letter from Jackson’s pulmonologist stating that it was required for Jackson’s lung health that he be in a universally masked classroom. Finally, on January 4, 2022, with the omicron wave in full force across the country, the school district granted Jackson a masking accommodation in his 504. It had been a fight, but I thought we were safe.
In February 2022, the four majority board members fired Corey Wise, the superintendent of DCSD, without cause. Mr. Wise’s attorney maintains Mr. Wise was fired out of retaliation for upholding ADA law as well as the district’s equity policy. Almost immediately, the school administrators began emailing each other about removing my son’s masking accommodation. I learned this through a Colorado Opens Records request in which I obtained all the emails between the principal of my son’s school, the “acting” superintendent, Danelle Hiatt, and the deputy counsel for DCSD, Wendy Jacobs. Despite the emails back and forth from February 18, 2022 to March 1, 2022, at no point was I contacted by anyone from the district or the school concerning Jackson’s masking accommodation. On March 1, 2022 I, along with all the other fourth grade parents, received an email from Jean Wolach stating masking was no longer required in the fourth grade classroom. Without consulting me, Jackson’s father, or Jackson’s physician, the school removed Jackson’s masking accommodation from his 504 placing his health and safety in danger.
I tried to move the boys to a neighboring school district. I was told there was no room. I applied to two private schools and, again, was told there was no room. How does a parent choose between their child’s health and their education? DCSD offered us no alternatives. All of a sudden our “American Dream” had become a nightmare. The school we had been a part of for five years stood by silently while the Board of Education and the acting superintendent endangered Jackson’s health. For five years they had partnered with me to keep Jackson healthy so he could have as normal a childhood as possible. For five years they watched us navigate quarterly doctor’s appointments, illnesses, countless courses of antibiotics, treatment regimens, hospitalization, sinus surgery…and not one of them stood up for Jackson. To say we felt betrayed doesn’t do it justice. They knew what we went through on a daily basis to keep Jackson healthy and when we needed them the most, they were silent.
When Jackson was diagnosed I made a promise to him that I would be his rock. I promised him I would make sure he had the most intentional and meaningful life possible. I promised him I would keep him as healthy as possible in order to have as normal a life as possible for as long as he would get to have it. I was keeping my promise. We were succeeding until four individuals driven by misinformation and a right wing conservative culture war took over the majority on the DCSD Board of Education.
I felt like I had no choice but to pull the boys from the only school they had known. Jackson’s health is our number one priority because keeping him healthy is the key to him having a life to live. After some research and with the assistance of my sister who was already living there, we made the decision to move to California, to a school district that was still masking and willing to accommodate his need for masking if necessary. We left the state in which the boys were born, the neighborhood we lived in for six years, the school they attended for five years, our home, our friends, the pulmonologist who had been caring for Jackson since his diagnosis…we left our entire lives and started over in California. It’s been a difficult transition for all of us. The boys miss their friends and their home. We don’t have the income to support the same kind of life here due to the increased cost of living, but it didn’t feel like we had any other choice. In addition to Jackson’s need for masking and my complete distrust of the school and the district, there were also threats to our safety coming from other parents and eventually, from the Board of Education itself. When I spoke out at a Board of Education meeting I had to be escorted to my car by a county sheriff for my own safety because individuals were giving me the finger and making public comments about my son. One parent sent an email to the principal of Jackson’s school describing what kind of mask he thought Jackson wore, when my son lifted his mask from his face, when he took his mask off to eat lunch, who he played with on the playground and whether or not they were wearing masks, an entire email detailing information about my son and his activities throughout the school day and, of course, the school did nothing, the principal did nothing. One parent sent me a message on social media stating he was going to find my son and make him cry and drink his tears. Recently, Director Becky Myers of the Board of Education sent me an email in which she called me a leftist activist and informed me she is a conservative Christian who will fight to the end for this country and threatened that I am going to lose my rights and that my voice will no longer be heard. The threats got to a point our physician sent me an email asking me to stop appearing publicly for fear over my and Jackson’s safety. Can you imagine? Can you imagine this world we are living in where a 10 year old boy with a chronic, progressive, life limiting illness becomes a target of such hatred? And not only do the school and the district do nothing to protect him, they actually participate? And no one is held accountable. The injustice of the entire situation keeps me up night after night.
Welcome to Red America. NatCon, extremist, right wing, GOP, no matter what you call it, it has real life consequences. What we have been through is just one illustration of the impact of Red America. It has happened to countless others. It has even happened to other families in DCSD. A high school student in DCSD with cystic fibrosis was denied a masking accommodation outright being told it would impact too many people. A student with cancer and undergoing chemotherapy who opted to just do online school because they wanted to remain private. There are currently six open investigations by the US Dept of Education Office of Civil Rights for alleged violations of Free and Appropriate Access to Education (FAPE) in the Douglas Country School District. One of those investigations is ours.
I will continue to tell our story and I will continue to fight for the community we left behind because it is my moral responsibility to do so.
So sad to learn of the hateful treatment you and your family received. The disregard for human suffering, the total lack of empathy expected of an institution serving children, and the hatred that represents more a fear of inconvenience are appalling. Your school district and its community missed a teachable moment to develop future generations of empathic cooperative adults. I wish the best for your son.
Adaptability is key to balance- if everyone took a step backward to pause and find creative ways of dealing with stress- used more humor- displayed more patience- everyone would be better off!!
Sorry Maureen that you disagree with my comment. Rude people need to be held accountable there is way too much acceptance for this behavior! It is respectful to teach people not to be abusive towards others and learn to be respectful? Passiveness does not work with all people!
Thank you, Dan and Elliot, for everything you have given us. Your newsletter provides a much needed invitation to think and feel. I cannot count the number of times (including now) I have shed tears at something you have written.
Your "Steady" words & thoughts send peace & tranquility to me & I'm sure many others, we all need to mentally secure & embrace having respect for everyone no matter who or what they are. You write so beautifully & put down on paper words that I think most of us could write, thank you so much for your "Calm Steadiness!" Best wishes for the the coming new year!
I truly hope that your Christmas was blessed. I sincerely enjoy reading your words as they give me hope and inspiration, even an authorization to feel bad if things aren’t right and that is a balm that soothes the soul.
So true but you have to put forth positive effort to gain and sustain gratitude! Today at grocery store I had to say “excuse me” twice to the same same couple to get around them. Second time the man said “again,”! I said excuse me, I didn’t want to hit your wife with my cart! He took off his glasses like he was mad and I just said, don’t be rude buddy! We both walked off but I just can’t leave rudeness alone if there’s no call for it!
Ellen, I’m thinking there may have been a more peaceful, empathetic option other than “don’t be rude buddy”. Please let go of the self righteous storyline. Steady just spoke of ways we can make our world better by being of service; seeing one another and ourselves as “imperfect” works in progress and summoning empathy in such daily mundane situations fosters resilience and peace every community yearns for.
Dan, thank you so much for your wisdom, compassion and understanding of the human journey. I am grateful for this letter and for the Steady community. Both provide me with hope in a time that hope does not come easily. Thank you.
Thank you for your reasoned words. I will always believe we are better when we serve. When we are empathetic. When we listen. When we say please and thank you. I believe you share those types of values in your writing and I appreciate that so much.
Dear Dan:
I’m grateful...for you. Thank you for sharing your vision, perceptions and insights through the years. You have made life a little easier to process, digest and understand.
Everyone has a story and there are times when a story must be shared, not just for clarity or for the sake of truth, but also to take back one’s life. My name is Kate Gould. I am a 48 year old mother of two boys ages 7 and 10. My story takes place in a southern suburb of Denver Colorado in 2021 and 2022. I was in my last year of graduate school at the Iliff School of Theology. My boys were in first and fourth grades at our neighborhood elementary school in the Douglas County School District (DCSD). My oldest, Jackson, had been there since kindergarten and loved it. He was a good student, kind, and considerate. My boys walked to school together every day picking up friends in the neighborhood along the way. They were active in gymnastics and music lessons. We were living the suburban version of the “American Dream.” We were happy.
In November of 2021, four new individuals were elected to the Douglas County Board of Education, having run on the platform of “Kids First.” Their platform came straight from the right wing conservative playbook - Critical Race Theory, Anti-Equity, Anti-Mask. Those four individuals represented the new majority and on December 8, 2021, less than one month after they were elected, they removed the mask mandate in Douglas County Public Schools. Those of us with children with medical conditions were told to work with our individual principals to get masking accommodations.
Jackson was diagnosed with cystic fibrosis at three weeks old via newborn screen. He takes over 30 pills and does almost 2 hours of treatments daily, just to stay healthy. Cystic fibrosis is a progressive, life limiting, genetic disease that affects the lungs, pancreas, and other organs. In people with CF, mutations in the cystic fibrosis transmembrane conductance regulator (CFTR) gene cause the CFTR protein to become dysfunctional. When the protein is not working correctly, it’s unable to help move chloride — a component of salt — to the cell surface. Without the chloride to attract water to the cell surface, the mucus in various organs becomes thick and sticky. In the lungs, the mucus clogs the airways and traps germs, like bacteria, leading to infections, inflammation, respiratory failure, and other complications. For this reason, avoiding germs is a top concern for people with CF.
The morning of December 9, 2021 I went directly to Jackson’s school, Heritage Elementary, and asked to see the principal, Jean Wolach, as parents had been instructed to do by the Board of Education President, Mike Peterson. I was told she was too busy to see me. I told the secretary I would wait. Two hours later, Mrs. Wolach met with me and I asked for a masking accommodation to be placed in Jackson’s 504 medical plan. It was denied. I provided a letter from Jackson’s pulmonologist and it was again denied. I hired a special education attorney. For the next month, the special education attorney and I met with school administrators and continued to be denied. We provided another letter from Jackson’s pulmonologist stating that it was required for Jackson’s lung health that he be in a universally masked classroom. Finally, on January 4, 2022, with the omicron wave in full force across the country, the school district granted Jackson a masking accommodation in his 504. It had been a fight, but I thought we were safe.
In February 2022, the four majority board members fired Corey Wise, the superintendent of DCSD, without cause. Mr. Wise’s attorney maintains Mr. Wise was fired out of retaliation for upholding ADA law as well as the district’s equity policy. Almost immediately, the school administrators began emailing each other about removing my son’s masking accommodation. I learned this through a Colorado Opens Records request in which I obtained all the emails between the principal of my son’s school, the “acting” superintendent, Danelle Hiatt, and the deputy counsel for DCSD, Wendy Jacobs. Despite the emails back and forth from February 18, 2022 to March 1, 2022, at no point was I contacted by anyone from the district or the school concerning Jackson’s masking accommodation. On March 1, 2022 I, along with all the other fourth grade parents, received an email from Jean Wolach stating masking was no longer required in the fourth grade classroom. Without consulting me, Jackson’s father, or Jackson’s physician, the school removed Jackson’s masking accommodation from his 504 placing his health and safety in danger.
I tried to move the boys to a neighboring school district. I was told there was no room. I applied to two private schools and, again, was told there was no room. How does a parent choose between their child’s health and their education? DCSD offered us no alternatives. All of a sudden our “American Dream” had become a nightmare. The school we had been a part of for five years stood by silently while the Board of Education and the acting superintendent endangered Jackson’s health. For five years they had partnered with me to keep Jackson healthy so he could have as normal a childhood as possible. For five years they watched us navigate quarterly doctor’s appointments, illnesses, countless courses of antibiotics, treatment regimens, hospitalization, sinus surgery…and not one of them stood up for Jackson. To say we felt betrayed doesn’t do it justice. They knew what we went through on a daily basis to keep Jackson healthy and when we needed them the most, they were silent.
When Jackson was diagnosed I made a promise to him that I would be his rock. I promised him I would make sure he had the most intentional and meaningful life possible. I promised him I would keep him as healthy as possible in order to have as normal a life as possible for as long as he would get to have it. I was keeping my promise. We were succeeding until four individuals driven by misinformation and a right wing conservative culture war took over the majority on the DCSD Board of Education.
I felt like I had no choice but to pull the boys from the only school they had known. Jackson’s health is our number one priority because keeping him healthy is the key to him having a life to live. After some research and with the assistance of my sister who was already living there, we made the decision to move to California, to a school district that was still masking and willing to accommodate his need for masking if necessary. We left the state in which the boys were born, the neighborhood we lived in for six years, the school they attended for five years, our home, our friends, the pulmonologist who had been caring for Jackson since his diagnosis…we left our entire lives and started over in California. It’s been a difficult transition for all of us. The boys miss their friends and their home. We don’t have the income to support the same kind of life here due to the increased cost of living, but it didn’t feel like we had any other choice. In addition to Jackson’s need for masking and my complete distrust of the school and the district, there were also threats to our safety coming from other parents and eventually, from the Board of Education itself. When I spoke out at a Board of Education meeting I had to be escorted to my car by a county sheriff for my own safety because individuals were giving me the finger and making public comments about my son. One parent sent an email to the principal of Jackson’s school describing what kind of mask he thought Jackson wore, when my son lifted his mask from his face, when he took his mask off to eat lunch, who he played with on the playground and whether or not they were wearing masks, an entire email detailing information about my son and his activities throughout the school day and, of course, the school did nothing, the principal did nothing. One parent sent me a message on social media stating he was going to find my son and make him cry and drink his tears. Recently, Director Becky Myers of the Board of Education sent me an email in which she called me a leftist activist and informed me she is a conservative Christian who will fight to the end for this country and threatened that I am going to lose my rights and that my voice will no longer be heard. The threats got to a point our physician sent me an email asking me to stop appearing publicly for fear over my and Jackson’s safety. Can you imagine? Can you imagine this world we are living in where a 10 year old boy with a chronic, progressive, life limiting illness becomes a target of such hatred? And not only do the school and the district do nothing to protect him, they actually participate? And no one is held accountable. The injustice of the entire situation keeps me up night after night.
Welcome to Red America. NatCon, extremist, right wing, GOP, no matter what you call it, it has real life consequences. What we have been through is just one illustration of the impact of Red America. It has happened to countless others. It has even happened to other families in DCSD. A high school student in DCSD with cystic fibrosis was denied a masking accommodation outright being told it would impact too many people. A student with cancer and undergoing chemotherapy who opted to just do online school because they wanted to remain private. There are currently six open investigations by the US Dept of Education Office of Civil Rights for alleged violations of Free and Appropriate Access to Education (FAPE) in the Douglas Country School District. One of those investigations is ours.
I will continue to tell our story and I will continue to fight for the community we left behind because it is my moral responsibility to do so.
So sad to learn of the hateful treatment you and your family received. The disregard for human suffering, the total lack of empathy expected of an institution serving children, and the hatred that represents more a fear of inconvenience are appalling. Your school district and its community missed a teachable moment to develop future generations of empathic cooperative adults. I wish the best for your son.
So many people “feed the homeless” one day a year but are perfectly content to forget about the starving the other 364 days
Adaptability is key to balance- if everyone took a step backward to pause and find creative ways of dealing with stress- used more humor- displayed more patience- everyone would be better off!!
Sorry Maureen that you disagree with my comment. Rude people need to be held accountable there is way too much acceptance for this behavior! It is respectful to teach people not to be abusive towards others and learn to be respectful? Passiveness does not work with all people!
Thank you, Dan and Elliot, for everything you have given us. Your newsletter provides a much needed invitation to think and feel. I cannot count the number of times (including now) I have shed tears at something you have written.
Thank you. Wishing you both a wonderful 2023.
Thank you for this. Hit home, right on time, today. ❤️
Your "Steady" words & thoughts send peace & tranquility to me & I'm sure many others, we all need to mentally secure & embrace having respect for everyone no matter who or what they are. You write so beautifully & put down on paper words that I think most of us could write, thank you so much for your "Calm Steadiness!" Best wishes for the the coming new year!
I truly hope that your Christmas was blessed. I sincerely enjoy reading your words as they give me hope and inspiration, even an authorization to feel bad if things aren’t right and that is a balm that soothes the soul.
So true but you have to put forth positive effort to gain and sustain gratitude! Today at grocery store I had to say “excuse me” twice to the same same couple to get around them. Second time the man said “again,”! I said excuse me, I didn’t want to hit your wife with my cart! He took off his glasses like he was mad and I just said, don’t be rude buddy! We both walked off but I just can’t leave rudeness alone if there’s no call for it!
Ellen, I’m thinking there may have been a more peaceful, empathetic option other than “don’t be rude buddy”. Please let go of the self righteous storyline. Steady just spoke of ways we can make our world better by being of service; seeing one another and ourselves as “imperfect” works in progress and summoning empathy in such daily mundane situations fosters resilience and peace every community yearns for.
Dan, thank you so much for your wisdom, compassion and understanding of the human journey. I am grateful for this letter and for the Steady community. Both provide me with hope in a time that hope does not come easily. Thank you.
Thank you for your reasoned words. I will always believe we are better when we serve. When we are empathetic. When we listen. When we say please and thank you. I believe you share those types of values in your writing and I appreciate that so much.
What a marvelously written piece doing justice to it's content.
The name of your community.... Steady...is so perfect for our unsteady times! Thank you!
Thanks!
Thank all of the STEADY Family‼️ I hope and pray that CHRISTMAS was JOYOUS‼️