I have a dog that happens to love people. When we walk in parks or on city streets, she usually spots people who need a boost -- from people who just love dogs, to people who are having a bad day, to people who are down and out. I've learned to discern whether people want some attention from my dog, often just by their expressions or body language. Together, over the last year, we have brightened the days of countless people with a few moments of conversation and the attentions of my sweet mutt. I think of her as a street therapy dog.
Acts of individual kindness are essential, but the biggest kindnesses we can give are those done collectively. We need to support a system that educates people and provides health care independent of wealth. We need to provide everybody what people need to thrive, and when people thrive, businesses and the economy thrives.
Some argue that it is Socialism or Communism to provide education, health care, and other things that people do not individually earn. They say that these policies are the government telling us what to do, taking our freedoms, and ruining the economy. They do not understand that the opposite is true where these policies create opportunities and freedoms for people and businesses. They do not understand that what people need to thrive is what businesses need to thrive.
Individual businesses do not create their necessary conditions and need these collective investments to exist and thrive. These policies enable Capitalism so that our people and businesses thrive.
To be genuinely compassionate and kind, we need to be so individually and collectively and collectively not only through churches, non-profits, and such but also through our local, state, and federal governments.
Morally, we should be kind individually and collectively because it is the right thing to do. Economically, we should be kind because it is in our own best interests individually and collectively as a society.
More people need to understand a few fundamental principles driving our economy and overcoming false arguments. We can elect the leaders who will enact the policies to become a more compassionate country and a more prosperous one where everyone can thrive.
This may seem unfair to some of you, appalling to others, and confusing to most. I am the product of a revolutionary. What I do is nothing big, but what is necessary. There are stories I’ve heard from a belief system in the 1960’s that if we “brought down the system” we could have Peace on Earth. I don’t know if that can happen. I don’t know if A.I. will help the human race, or end up destroying us. I know that the waves cellphones produce cause cancer. I know 5G causes cancer, which is why so many communications workers don’t want to install the poles. You’d think we’d be more advanced by now, but no, we as humans are still expendable, and not exactly for the “greater good.” Everyone, and I mean Earth, seeks a healthy, long life filled with happiness and love. No one wants to be exterminated, or undermined for sake of “progress,” and I think that with the pandemic, many people “woke” up. I know I did. I left the rat race and entered “the system.” The system for those who “need help.” This is where we need to focus our energy. Social services. The voices of those on the fringe feel like their pleas fall on deaf ears. The disabled, the elderly, the mentally-unsteady, and the non-believers in the advances of science. The last group need education. The first two need assurance that they are not expendable. The third need to not be stigmatized, but given the time of day to be understood. This is where the feeling of “oppression” is seeded, and it’s complicated because those that think they are in “the know” (white-privileged bohemian sudo-liberals aka. “Yippies”) didn’t understand what it meant to break down the system in the “right way,” or the way that could have led to human salvation, at least for Americans as the “great experiments” in what could have been possible to create an established Peace. But nothing really changed, and you know it because of the birth of BLM, and MeToo and the constant desire of youth to feed their egos with fame and financial gain, no matter who they con. Con-artistry is an epidemic more destructive than even this pandemic. I know because I’ve been there. Where I believed I could find empathy and compassion in others, I was met with people who could see my naïveté and take advantage of my deeply-valued beliefs and turn them against me. I thought I could get to the part of everyone that needed/wanted love, but the system broke them down too far for too long, that they accepted that peace will never exist, and that instead, went the way of survival of the fittest, which is why we still have gangs and poverty and oppression and a system that doesn’t work. I could only contribute in the only way I knew how: as a interviewer and witness to the stories of the oppressed and of the change-makers that do their little part to teach the “ancient ways,” to preserve and create palatable stories that teach what was in our real history, and what is possible. But then the ability to communicate became saturated, and my voice is now just noise. But, I am still telling this story, even if it does fall on deaf ears.
What if I told you that everything that anybody has ever thought was “truth” and yet, not what is “true” in terms of Peace… “Hypocrisy is the greatest luxury” was a phrase in the 1990’s during, what I would call, a “silent” revolution. These were the decendence of the revolutionaries of the 1960’s. People of color, like me, and those that “kinda got it,” but because of the color of their skin, or their cis-gender, could not relate. Although, to be fair, people of color have a harder time “blending in” then those that “feel” oppressed because they are not able to express their true identity, or they don’t want to for fear of being stigmatized, like those like me, who are diagnosed “chronically mentally-ill.” That is what got me in the social system, because my perspective does not fit into the “status-quo” of capitalism. But I’m getting off topic.
There are so many layers to peel back, and they are both individual and collective, and there are so many of us, talking our story, but not listening. So I gave up, and I’m only saying this here, just to see if anything happens. I don’t have the energy to push anymore. My time has come and gone, and I take care of my parents now. In the end, all we need is love, and compassion, and empathy. There aren’t enough of us, yet, who would be willing to humble ourselves, and live within our true means. Nomads, like me, have realized that, but for what it’s worth, those sudo-hippy-liberals who are pouring their financial gain into their luxury vans aren’t actually helping. They are romanizing it. Just like those that flocked to “experience” what was happening in San Francisco in the 1960’s. Hypocrisy is the greatest luxury.
So how do we get there? Quit your job. Find your way to balance without more than poverty-level wages. No more than the least of us. Do what you do “for free” and be innovative. What do you actually, really need? Protection from the sun and shitty weather. Food. Tribe/Family. Community. Someone to care about/for you after you’ve exhausted your prime years of change-making. The last of these is where we need to focus a lot of our efforts, in my opinion. There are not enough people who care, yet. And there won’t be until you “let go” of your material wealth and declutter all your fluff and cushinesses and be humble. Stand amongst the least of us. Understand what the system is, how it’s broken, by getting into it, sitting with it, and observe what is causing the breakdown. Find out who is benefitting, and how you’ve become a puppet, playing their game. Revolution only happens when we are willing to sacrifice big. If you want to go nomadic, fine, but spend no more than the least of us could afford, and offer homes for those who are already homeless with the rest of your riches. Don’t know what I’m talking about? Here is a start: https://www.dhhs.nh.gov/dphs/bchs/std/documents/fplguidelines.pdf
Can you live within the confines of even what the government deems as poverty? If not, you’re too wealthy. Let go. Change starts with knowing, and you’ll never know until you go there, to that place that you fear most. Sit with it. Understand it. Come to know it as the real reality of this country. Of the status-quo. Of the game you are playing, but not living in. Understand who your puppeteers are, and what they want you to believe you need. Most of you won’t understand me. That’s okay. At least I’ve said my peace for the day. ;-) Good luck fighting the good fight. Be kind to each other, even when you feel offended. Be curious as to why.
I also believe we all need to do our part in helping others and should do so for our own good as well. I’ve been especially mindful of this myself of late. When you open your eyes and look for opportunities to be of some, even small, service to another you will find that opportunities abound! Yesterday as I was exiting a doctors appt I saw an older gentleman struggling to get his arm into the sleeve of his coat. I was actually putting my coat on at the time and I was in his space a little bit so I grabbed his coat and moved it so he was able to put his arm in his sleeve and then pulled it up to his shoulders. It was a bit of a risk but I didn’t think twice to help him, partly to get him out of the way 😂. He didn’t thank me in any overly zealous way, as I may have, but that wasn’t at all necessary and it isn’t why I helped. A simple, heart felt thank you was so nice to hear and yet the greatest thanks was the feeling it left me with, which continued throughout my day of helping another human being with a very simple task. Let’s all do this whenever we can to make the world, even our corner, a better place!
A friend of my daughter's from childhood, is going through the ending of a 35 year marriage. I responded to her obvious pain with encouraging words in a Facebook post, and her response to me was, in part, that she had always thought of me as her second Mom and that she loved me. I am touched by this and my immediate thoughts were to wonder what I had done or said way back then. Of course, I don't remember. You just can't know what will result from loving someone.
14 years ago, a group of landowners in our town started cutting up a couple of extra cords of firewood each year for donation to families in need in our area who heat with wood. Originally, it was just a few friends working together. They'd hear through the community grapevine that someone was in need, and would anonymously make a pile of firewood appear at the recipient's home. The project has expanded over the years. It's still organized by two of the original friends, but the project has expanded. As with most volunteer operations, there is a core of regular volunteers, but the effort has grown. We've had over 100 community members involved in one way or another over the years: groups gathering for volunteer work days to process and stack firewood, people donating trees which were taken down or blew over in a wind storm - and crews showing up to turn those trees into firewood, the local Boy Scout and Girl Scout troops have helped split and stack wood, built storage racks, and assisted with deliveries. Each year a Community Forestry class from the University of Vermont comes down with their professor to help split a couple of cords of wood. Area tree services have dropped off logs. A local landscaping company brought their dump trailer to make an emergency delivery in the middle of a snow storm.
To keep things as confidential as possible, small teams of 2 or 3 make the deliveries in our small town and in the 5 surrounding communities. When he recipients are unable to handle the stacking themselves, those delivering stack it for them. Often, the recipients aren't home when the deliveries are made. When there is someone home, there are often tears of relief.
As we expanded from just a few friends to a larger community effort, we modeled our program on one which had been running for a number of years in another community in our area. Likewise, our efforts have served as a model for other communities. We share resources among the various programs, and when one is out of wood or is unable to make a delivery, a neighboring group will fill in.
It has been heartening to see the community support and to se the idea spread.
Last week I went to the pharmacy to check on a prescription. I don't typically check on my prescriptions because I usually get a text message when they're ready for pick up or if there is a delay. I waited for several days and tried to call numerous times and was met with hours long waiting times so I decided to stop at the pharmacy on my way to pick up lunch for my husband and myself. When I arrived there were about 4 people waiting. I took my place at a covid distance and waited my turn. When I finally was able to speak to someone he was a slightly older than middle aged man and he had no idea how to get the information I needed, (he was new and this was his first week working at a pharmacy). He said I would need to speak to the pharmacist but it could take a while because they were so overwhelmed. They only had 1 pharmacist and 1 tech and him. The rest of the staff were out very sick with covid. After just a few minutes I spoke with the pharmacist and this poor woman was exhausted. Evidently she had been covering all the pharmacy shifts, 9:00 am - 8:00 pm for days with almost no breaks. I told her I was on my way to pick up lunch and what would she and her staff like me to bring them. She was shocked and tried to give me her credit card to pay for it! Of course that wasn't going happen! I took their orders and brought their lunch back. There was no one at the window to take it so I manuevered it under the plexiglass and sat it down on the counter. As I walked thru the store to leave I heard a loud thank you from the pharmacy. I hope that day was just a tiny bit easier for her and her staff. I would like to say what was really amazing was the change in the demeaner of the other people in line waiting. Most looked frustrated they had to wait so long but when they saw what I did their expressions changed and lightened and I just hope they decided to show more patience and kindness to this hardworking, exhausted team.
"A Helping Hand" inspired me to act. I have been visiting periodically a friend who had a stroke a few years ago and lost the use of her right hand. She was a prolific knitter and crocheter and I have been thinking (for a few years now!) about buying her devices to help her do this one-handed. After reading "A Helping Hand", I knew it was time for me to finally just act. In an afternoon, I crafted a simple device of wood pieces and clamp to hold a crochet hook and allow her to crochet with her left hand. She was so happy and it's all due to Steady! Thank you for inspiring so many of us!
Beautiful sentiment. I am a clinical social worker. I have lived my life in service to others, forgoing the giant incomes of lawyers and physicians, with a Master's Degree and 30 years of professional experience. Before my work as a clinical social worker, I was a community volunteer. Do good works for the benefit of others. There is beauty and joy to be found outside of yourself if only you will try.
I love all the stories of acts of service to others in this thread. Remember, though, that a kindness can be as simple as acknowledging the people around us who often go unseen - the janitorial staff at your place of work, the employees stocking shelves in your grocery store, the check-out person wherever you shop, the custodial staff cleaning the restrooms all day in the airport - the list goes on and on. It costs nothing to share a smile or a word of thanks, and it can brighten a bad day.
I was raised to offer help where I could but it wasn't until I read a passage by the Dalai Lama that I truly understood loving my neighbor as myself. The passage basically said it is easy to love the lovable. The gift is in loving the unlovable. That changed my life.
At the time, I had an elderly, cranky, neighbor who had always been rude to my adult, developmentally delayed, daughter. I was so angry with that neighbor that even seeing her in the yard ruined my mood. She was the definition (at least, in my mind) of unlovable. I decided to love that woman, even if it killed me!
We began sending a plate of dinner every evening for her and her husband. Then my daughter, the one who is developmentally delayed, began taking their trash cans down every trash day and bringing them back up. Small things here and there that really took very little time or effort.
Over time, this neighbor became very pleasant and kind and it was no longer painful to see her or talk to her. One day, I realized that we actually loved her and we were truly heartbroken when she died about 10 years later.
So did she change or did I? I am certain it was the change in me that did the trick because I have discovered since then, I have met very few unlovable people. I have learned to search for the inner person who is worthy of my love and attention and help and surprise! That inner person is in literally everyone!
And most surprising is that no matter how much time and effort I put into serving others, I am the one who benefits most, I think.
My family has been volunteering with a local children's charity for more than 25 years. I have chaired the Christmas gift drive for most of those years. Needless to say, November and December are pretty busy! When my mother died a few days after thanksgiving, I found so much love and support from the folks I volunteer with and I think I managed the grief better by being back in the center, knowing that our work would bring smiles to hundreds of children. My mom knew how important this work was to our community and I know she would have preferred me doing the work rather than sitting at home crying. Giving my time to help others helped me heal. I am confident of that.
As I am turning 70 in 2022, I have chosen to attempt 70 random acts of kindness. I know that when I get out of self I am better emotionally. And I agree with your thoughts of looking for balance amongst the craziness of our country right now. Thank you for your Steady newsletter. With Katie Couric’s wake-up email each day and your writings, I stop and breathe in calmness. ❤️
I have a dog that happens to love people. When we walk in parks or on city streets, she usually spots people who need a boost -- from people who just love dogs, to people who are having a bad day, to people who are down and out. I've learned to discern whether people want some attention from my dog, often just by their expressions or body language. Together, over the last year, we have brightened the days of countless people with a few moments of conversation and the attentions of my sweet mutt. I think of her as a street therapy dog.
Acts of individual kindness are essential, but the biggest kindnesses we can give are those done collectively. We need to support a system that educates people and provides health care independent of wealth. We need to provide everybody what people need to thrive, and when people thrive, businesses and the economy thrives.
Some argue that it is Socialism or Communism to provide education, health care, and other things that people do not individually earn. They say that these policies are the government telling us what to do, taking our freedoms, and ruining the economy. They do not understand that the opposite is true where these policies create opportunities and freedoms for people and businesses. They do not understand that what people need to thrive is what businesses need to thrive.
Individual businesses do not create their necessary conditions and need these collective investments to exist and thrive. These policies enable Capitalism so that our people and businesses thrive.
To be genuinely compassionate and kind, we need to be so individually and collectively and collectively not only through churches, non-profits, and such but also through our local, state, and federal governments.
Morally, we should be kind individually and collectively because it is the right thing to do. Economically, we should be kind because it is in our own best interests individually and collectively as a society.
More people need to understand a few fundamental principles driving our economy and overcoming false arguments. We can elect the leaders who will enact the policies to become a more compassionate country and a more prosperous one where everyone can thrive.
Here is a short video on How Bottom-Up Economics Works: www.votereducationproject.com/hbuew
This may seem unfair to some of you, appalling to others, and confusing to most. I am the product of a revolutionary. What I do is nothing big, but what is necessary. There are stories I’ve heard from a belief system in the 1960’s that if we “brought down the system” we could have Peace on Earth. I don’t know if that can happen. I don’t know if A.I. will help the human race, or end up destroying us. I know that the waves cellphones produce cause cancer. I know 5G causes cancer, which is why so many communications workers don’t want to install the poles. You’d think we’d be more advanced by now, but no, we as humans are still expendable, and not exactly for the “greater good.” Everyone, and I mean Earth, seeks a healthy, long life filled with happiness and love. No one wants to be exterminated, or undermined for sake of “progress,” and I think that with the pandemic, many people “woke” up. I know I did. I left the rat race and entered “the system.” The system for those who “need help.” This is where we need to focus our energy. Social services. The voices of those on the fringe feel like their pleas fall on deaf ears. The disabled, the elderly, the mentally-unsteady, and the non-believers in the advances of science. The last group need education. The first two need assurance that they are not expendable. The third need to not be stigmatized, but given the time of day to be understood. This is where the feeling of “oppression” is seeded, and it’s complicated because those that think they are in “the know” (white-privileged bohemian sudo-liberals aka. “Yippies”) didn’t understand what it meant to break down the system in the “right way,” or the way that could have led to human salvation, at least for Americans as the “great experiments” in what could have been possible to create an established Peace. But nothing really changed, and you know it because of the birth of BLM, and MeToo and the constant desire of youth to feed their egos with fame and financial gain, no matter who they con. Con-artistry is an epidemic more destructive than even this pandemic. I know because I’ve been there. Where I believed I could find empathy and compassion in others, I was met with people who could see my naïveté and take advantage of my deeply-valued beliefs and turn them against me. I thought I could get to the part of everyone that needed/wanted love, but the system broke them down too far for too long, that they accepted that peace will never exist, and that instead, went the way of survival of the fittest, which is why we still have gangs and poverty and oppression and a system that doesn’t work. I could only contribute in the only way I knew how: as a interviewer and witness to the stories of the oppressed and of the change-makers that do their little part to teach the “ancient ways,” to preserve and create palatable stories that teach what was in our real history, and what is possible. But then the ability to communicate became saturated, and my voice is now just noise. But, I am still telling this story, even if it does fall on deaf ears.
What if I told you that everything that anybody has ever thought was “truth” and yet, not what is “true” in terms of Peace… “Hypocrisy is the greatest luxury” was a phrase in the 1990’s during, what I would call, a “silent” revolution. These were the decendence of the revolutionaries of the 1960’s. People of color, like me, and those that “kinda got it,” but because of the color of their skin, or their cis-gender, could not relate. Although, to be fair, people of color have a harder time “blending in” then those that “feel” oppressed because they are not able to express their true identity, or they don’t want to for fear of being stigmatized, like those like me, who are diagnosed “chronically mentally-ill.” That is what got me in the social system, because my perspective does not fit into the “status-quo” of capitalism. But I’m getting off topic.
There are so many layers to peel back, and they are both individual and collective, and there are so many of us, talking our story, but not listening. So I gave up, and I’m only saying this here, just to see if anything happens. I don’t have the energy to push anymore. My time has come and gone, and I take care of my parents now. In the end, all we need is love, and compassion, and empathy. There aren’t enough of us, yet, who would be willing to humble ourselves, and live within our true means. Nomads, like me, have realized that, but for what it’s worth, those sudo-hippy-liberals who are pouring their financial gain into their luxury vans aren’t actually helping. They are romanizing it. Just like those that flocked to “experience” what was happening in San Francisco in the 1960’s. Hypocrisy is the greatest luxury.
So how do we get there? Quit your job. Find your way to balance without more than poverty-level wages. No more than the least of us. Do what you do “for free” and be innovative. What do you actually, really need? Protection from the sun and shitty weather. Food. Tribe/Family. Community. Someone to care about/for you after you’ve exhausted your prime years of change-making. The last of these is where we need to focus a lot of our efforts, in my opinion. There are not enough people who care, yet. And there won’t be until you “let go” of your material wealth and declutter all your fluff and cushinesses and be humble. Stand amongst the least of us. Understand what the system is, how it’s broken, by getting into it, sitting with it, and observe what is causing the breakdown. Find out who is benefitting, and how you’ve become a puppet, playing their game. Revolution only happens when we are willing to sacrifice big. If you want to go nomadic, fine, but spend no more than the least of us could afford, and offer homes for those who are already homeless with the rest of your riches. Don’t know what I’m talking about? Here is a start: https://www.dhhs.nh.gov/dphs/bchs/std/documents/fplguidelines.pdf
Can you live within the confines of even what the government deems as poverty? If not, you’re too wealthy. Let go. Change starts with knowing, and you’ll never know until you go there, to that place that you fear most. Sit with it. Understand it. Come to know it as the real reality of this country. Of the status-quo. Of the game you are playing, but not living in. Understand who your puppeteers are, and what they want you to believe you need. Most of you won’t understand me. That’s okay. At least I’ve said my peace for the day. ;-) Good luck fighting the good fight. Be kind to each other, even when you feel offended. Be curious as to why.
I also believe we all need to do our part in helping others and should do so for our own good as well. I’ve been especially mindful of this myself of late. When you open your eyes and look for opportunities to be of some, even small, service to another you will find that opportunities abound! Yesterday as I was exiting a doctors appt I saw an older gentleman struggling to get his arm into the sleeve of his coat. I was actually putting my coat on at the time and I was in his space a little bit so I grabbed his coat and moved it so he was able to put his arm in his sleeve and then pulled it up to his shoulders. It was a bit of a risk but I didn’t think twice to help him, partly to get him out of the way 😂. He didn’t thank me in any overly zealous way, as I may have, but that wasn’t at all necessary and it isn’t why I helped. A simple, heart felt thank you was so nice to hear and yet the greatest thanks was the feeling it left me with, which continued throughout my day of helping another human being with a very simple task. Let’s all do this whenever we can to make the world, even our corner, a better place!
I wholeheartedly agree and believe in this. It literally warmed my heart on this cold, cold day. Thank you!
I wholeheartedly agree with this. It has literally warmed my heart on this cold, cold day. Thank you!
A friend of my daughter's from childhood, is going through the ending of a 35 year marriage. I responded to her obvious pain with encouraging words in a Facebook post, and her response to me was, in part, that she had always thought of me as her second Mom and that she loved me. I am touched by this and my immediate thoughts were to wonder what I had done or said way back then. Of course, I don't remember. You just can't know what will result from loving someone.
14 years ago, a group of landowners in our town started cutting up a couple of extra cords of firewood each year for donation to families in need in our area who heat with wood. Originally, it was just a few friends working together. They'd hear through the community grapevine that someone was in need, and would anonymously make a pile of firewood appear at the recipient's home. The project has expanded over the years. It's still organized by two of the original friends, but the project has expanded. As with most volunteer operations, there is a core of regular volunteers, but the effort has grown. We've had over 100 community members involved in one way or another over the years: groups gathering for volunteer work days to process and stack firewood, people donating trees which were taken down or blew over in a wind storm - and crews showing up to turn those trees into firewood, the local Boy Scout and Girl Scout troops have helped split and stack wood, built storage racks, and assisted with deliveries. Each year a Community Forestry class from the University of Vermont comes down with their professor to help split a couple of cords of wood. Area tree services have dropped off logs. A local landscaping company brought their dump trailer to make an emergency delivery in the middle of a snow storm.
To keep things as confidential as possible, small teams of 2 or 3 make the deliveries in our small town and in the 5 surrounding communities. When he recipients are unable to handle the stacking themselves, those delivering stack it for them. Often, the recipients aren't home when the deliveries are made. When there is someone home, there are often tears of relief.
As we expanded from just a few friends to a larger community effort, we modeled our program on one which had been running for a number of years in another community in our area. Likewise, our efforts have served as a model for other communities. We share resources among the various programs, and when one is out of wood or is unable to make a delivery, a neighboring group will fill in.
It has been heartening to see the community support and to se the idea spread.
Last week I went to the pharmacy to check on a prescription. I don't typically check on my prescriptions because I usually get a text message when they're ready for pick up or if there is a delay. I waited for several days and tried to call numerous times and was met with hours long waiting times so I decided to stop at the pharmacy on my way to pick up lunch for my husband and myself. When I arrived there were about 4 people waiting. I took my place at a covid distance and waited my turn. When I finally was able to speak to someone he was a slightly older than middle aged man and he had no idea how to get the information I needed, (he was new and this was his first week working at a pharmacy). He said I would need to speak to the pharmacist but it could take a while because they were so overwhelmed. They only had 1 pharmacist and 1 tech and him. The rest of the staff were out very sick with covid. After just a few minutes I spoke with the pharmacist and this poor woman was exhausted. Evidently she had been covering all the pharmacy shifts, 9:00 am - 8:00 pm for days with almost no breaks. I told her I was on my way to pick up lunch and what would she and her staff like me to bring them. She was shocked and tried to give me her credit card to pay for it! Of course that wasn't going happen! I took their orders and brought their lunch back. There was no one at the window to take it so I manuevered it under the plexiglass and sat it down on the counter. As I walked thru the store to leave I heard a loud thank you from the pharmacy. I hope that day was just a tiny bit easier for her and her staff. I would like to say what was really amazing was the change in the demeaner of the other people in line waiting. Most looked frustrated they had to wait so long but when they saw what I did their expressions changed and lightened and I just hope they decided to show more patience and kindness to this hardworking, exhausted team.
"A Helping Hand" inspired me to act. I have been visiting periodically a friend who had a stroke a few years ago and lost the use of her right hand. She was a prolific knitter and crocheter and I have been thinking (for a few years now!) about buying her devices to help her do this one-handed. After reading "A Helping Hand", I knew it was time for me to finally just act. In an afternoon, I crafted a simple device of wood pieces and clamp to hold a crochet hook and allow her to crochet with her left hand. She was so happy and it's all due to Steady! Thank you for inspiring so many of us!
Beautiful sentiment. I am a clinical social worker. I have lived my life in service to others, forgoing the giant incomes of lawyers and physicians, with a Master's Degree and 30 years of professional experience. Before my work as a clinical social worker, I was a community volunteer. Do good works for the benefit of others. There is beauty and joy to be found outside of yourself if only you will try.
I love all the stories of acts of service to others in this thread. Remember, though, that a kindness can be as simple as acknowledging the people around us who often go unseen - the janitorial staff at your place of work, the employees stocking shelves in your grocery store, the check-out person wherever you shop, the custodial staff cleaning the restrooms all day in the airport - the list goes on and on. It costs nothing to share a smile or a word of thanks, and it can brighten a bad day.
I was raised to offer help where I could but it wasn't until I read a passage by the Dalai Lama that I truly understood loving my neighbor as myself. The passage basically said it is easy to love the lovable. The gift is in loving the unlovable. That changed my life.
At the time, I had an elderly, cranky, neighbor who had always been rude to my adult, developmentally delayed, daughter. I was so angry with that neighbor that even seeing her in the yard ruined my mood. She was the definition (at least, in my mind) of unlovable. I decided to love that woman, even if it killed me!
We began sending a plate of dinner every evening for her and her husband. Then my daughter, the one who is developmentally delayed, began taking their trash cans down every trash day and bringing them back up. Small things here and there that really took very little time or effort.
Over time, this neighbor became very pleasant and kind and it was no longer painful to see her or talk to her. One day, I realized that we actually loved her and we were truly heartbroken when she died about 10 years later.
So did she change or did I? I am certain it was the change in me that did the trick because I have discovered since then, I have met very few unlovable people. I have learned to search for the inner person who is worthy of my love and attention and help and surprise! That inner person is in literally everyone!
And most surprising is that no matter how much time and effort I put into serving others, I am the one who benefits most, I think.
My family has been volunteering with a local children's charity for more than 25 years. I have chaired the Christmas gift drive for most of those years. Needless to say, November and December are pretty busy! When my mother died a few days after thanksgiving, I found so much love and support from the folks I volunteer with and I think I managed the grief better by being back in the center, knowing that our work would bring smiles to hundreds of children. My mom knew how important this work was to our community and I know she would have preferred me doing the work rather than sitting at home crying. Giving my time to help others helped me heal. I am confident of that.
A long time favorite: I cannot do everything, but I can do something. I will do what I can.
As I am turning 70 in 2022, I have chosen to attempt 70 random acts of kindness. I know that when I get out of self I am better emotionally. And I agree with your thoughts of looking for balance amongst the craziness of our country right now. Thank you for your Steady newsletter. With Katie Couric’s wake-up email each day and your writings, I stop and breathe in calmness. ❤️